The Yoko Factor

Writer: Doug Petrie Director: David Grossman

Cast : Sarah Michelle Gellar as Buffy Summers, Nicholas Brendon as Xander Harris, Alyson Hannigan as Willow Rosenberg, Marc Blucas as Riley Finn, James Marsters as Spike, Anthony Stewart Head as Rupert Giles.

Main guest stars : David Boreanaz as Angel, Leonard Roberts as Forrest Gates, Amber Benson as Tara, Emma Caulfield as Anya, Connor O’Farrell as Colonel McNamara, George Hertzberg as Adam. Original broadcast date : May 9, 2000

My one-line description: This week at the WWF: Angel “The Dark, Brooding One” vs. Riley “Captain Cardboard” Finn. Place your bets now. Via some high-tech video communications equipment, Colonel McNamara is reporting to an old man in a business suit, Mr. Ward, about the status of the Initiative. He says that their capture ratio is high, but morale is low due to the death of Professor Walsh and the escape of Adam. Ward brings up Riley’s defection, and although the Colonel doesn’t think much of him, Ward makes it clear he wants him back. Meanwhile, Spike is convincing Adam that once his plan goes down, Buffy will be there, in the thick of things. He asks Adam if he’s ready for that; Adam answers that he’s counting on it. Spike then tells Adam about the two Slayers he killed, and Adam asks why he fears Buffy. Spike protests that he doesn’t fear her – he’s just had some bad luck, and with the chip in his head, he can’t do anything. Adam says that he knows how he feels – trapped like an animal, unable to carry out the urges inside him. He promises to make Spike whole again; the vampire, moved, realizes why Adam has so much influence on demons. Adam promises to remove the chip, on one condition – he’ll do it when Spike gets the Slayer where Adam wants her. Spike counters that it won’t be easy – the Slayer has friends. Adam suggests that they take her friends away from her, and Spike, liking the idea, promises he’ll take care of it himself. Buffy, fresh back from going to see Angel in L.A., enters her dorm room on campus and finds Willow’s bed neatly done, seemingly unslept in for days. She plops down on her own bed, not looking very happy. Meanwhile, Riley is still hiding from the Initiative in the remains of Sunnydale High. Xander visits him, bringing him some rather, um, peculiar clothes to wear while he does his laundry. Riley asks Xander if Buffy is back from L.A. yet, and deduces from Xander’s expression that he doesn’t like Angel much. Xander asks Riley how much he knows about Angel, and Riley answers that he knows everything – he went evil, she cured him, he left. Xander involuntarily fills in with another tidbit – about the moment of happiness that made Angel lose his soul. Riley figures out the rest, and Xander tries to reassure him, saying it’s ancient history. But Riley isn’t so sure about that… Giles is at home singing and playing guitar when, looking up, he sees Spike standing before him. Startled, he stops playing and asks him what he’s doing there. Spike is there to cut a deal – files from the Initiative for a year’s supply of money, bushels of cash and a guarantee not to be staked. Giles agrees, but Spike says this deal is for the Slayer only. Giles reminds him he’s her Watcher, but Spike, scoffing at him, corrects that for former Watcher and tells him the Slayer treats him like a retired librarian. The vampire leaves, asking Giles to pass the word to Buffy if she’s interested; Giles, depressed, pours himself a drink. In Tara’s room, Willow and Tara play with their new cat, MissKittyFantastico, and make plans for the next semester. Willow says that she still hasn’t made plans for housing; Tara comments that she thought Willow would be rooming with Buffy again, but the redhead comments that it hardly feels like they’re roommates now, what with Buffy over at Riley’s place most of the time and herself with Tara. Later, Riley bravely ventures out to Buffy’s room – wearing Xander’s clownish pants. She’s worried he might not be safe at her place, but he informs her he’s tapped into the Initiative’s radio frequencies so he can know where they are. Noticing that Buffy doesn’t look too happy, he asks her what’s wrong, and she tells him that Angel upset her a little. However, she doesn’t want to talk about it; she just wants to patrol and find Adam. Riley agrees and leaves, not very happy. Xander and Anya drop off some military fatigues at Spike’s crypt; Spike finds a gun in the bundle and points it vaguely at Xander, causing the chip to fire. The vampire is outraged. Xander informs him it’s a fake, to which Spike invokes self-defence; Xander, of course, couldn’t care less. Spike comments that the attitude won’t help him in boot camp; Anya exclaims in indignation that Xander didn’t tell her he was joining the army. Xander says he’s not, and asks Spike where he heard that story. The vampire tells about hearing Buffy and Willow talking about how Xander “could be all he could be”; Xander is offended that his friends would consider him useless. On patrol in the woods, Buffy runs into Forrest, and they almost shoot at each other. Relenting, they enter a cave, both looking for Adam, and continue their bickering about her taking Riley away from the Initiative. They’re about to come to blows when Adam shows up. Buffy tries to shoot him, but Adam knocks the weapon out of her hand. She tries to tell Forrest to run, but the soldier shoots at Adam anyway. Adam absorbs the blast, then impales Forrest on the skewers of his Polgara arm and throws the corpse back at Buffy. Buffy manages to escape, but loses her footing while running down the hill; she tumbles down, hits her head against a rock and loses consciousness. That night, Spike goes calmly to Giles’ front door, wearing the military fatigues, and suddenly bursts inside, claiming he outran the buggers. He gives some computer disks to Willow, and she loads one into the laptop. He asks Giles when he’s getting paid, but the Watcher says it won’t be before Willow cracks the code – the disks are encrypted. The vampire asks the redhead how long it’ll take, and she answers it’ll be difficult. He mutters that she isn’t the whiz she used to be, and goes on to say that he heard Buffy and Xander say she was too busy with her “new thing” (magic) to have time to work computers much anymore. Apparently they said it was just a phase, and she’d get over it. A hurt Willow reflects that she knew Buffy was freaked. Over at the Initiative, Colonel McNamara walks through the Pit, overflowing with demons; a lieutenant reports that they’re at full capacity, and that the demons will be at each other’s throats soon. McNamara doesn’t seem to have a problem with that. Then he gets a mayday from a team in the field, apparently under attack. In the ruins of Sunnydale High, Riley hears the mayday and grabs his gear. He goes to the mayday’s location, an alley where a commando seems to be having a lot of trouble. Riley sees a figure standing over some unconscious commandos – it’s Angel. The vampire turns around to face him, and recognizes him as Riley Finn. Riley doesn’t know him, but Angel says they have a friend in common. “Angel”, Riley says in not very much awe. He asks what could possibly have happened with Buffy to make him lose his soul, but Angel answers that’s none of his business. He turns to leave, and Riley asks him where he’s going; “To see an old girlfriend”, the vampire answers. Riley says he won’t let that happen, and the two start fighting. Riley manages to hold his own for a little while, but it’s not long before Angel beats him up good. Then they here a car arriving, and both flee in different directions before the Initiative vehicle arrives. Buffy has just returned to her dorm room and is examining the cut in her forehead. Angel arrives, and she invites him in. She angrily asks him if he came because he thought of something else hurtful to say to her, but he tells her that he doesn’t have a lot of time. She starts to listen to him, but then Riley bursts in, pointing a gun at Angel. Noticing his bruised face, she demands to know what happened, and Riley and Angel start blaming each other, before coming to blows once again. Buffy stops it, threatening to send them both to the hospital. Buffy tells Riley she needs to speak to Angel alone; Riley says he’s not leaving the room, so Buffy and Angel step out into the corridor. There, she asks him what he thought he was doing, pounding on her boyfriend. He says he was trying to make things better – then specifies that he came to apologize for his lashing out at her in L.A. Buffy says he was right to say they don’t have the right to barge into each other’s lives anymore. Angel adds that he noticed things were intense in Sunnydale, and he wants to help; however, Buffy tells him the best thing would be for him to leave. He does, but not before telling her that he doesn’t like Riley. A very happy Spike walks into Adam’s cave and reports that the Scoobies were easier to tear apart then he thought at first. Adam asks him if he’s sure, and Spike compares the Scoobies to the Beatles – the band split up and everybody blamed Yoko, who just happened to be there when the break-up happened. The same happens with college kids, leaving home and growing apart. He asks Adam if he has everything, but Adam answers there’s one more thing… Buffy goes back into her room, and Riley tells her that if she’s about to break his heart, she ought to do it fast. She assures him that nothing happened, with Angel, wondering how he can even think that. Riley tells her that when he found out what makes Angel lose his soul, he went a little berserk – making Buffy quite angry that Xander told him. Riley thinks Angel had gone bad again, but Buffy assures him that he didn’t. She asks him if she’s ever given him any reason not to trust her, and he tells her that he’s so in love with her he can’t think straight. She answers that she knows how he feels. Then she breaks the bad news to him… Forrest is dead. She explains how Adam killed him, and a broken Riley gets up and tells her he has to leave. Later, at Giles’ place, Buffy paces while Willow is still trying to crack the code. In the background, Giles is pouring himself drink after drink. Finally, Buffy runs out of patience and wants to go back to the cave to track Adam. Willow sarcastically comments that she might get lucky and Adam will rip her arms off. “You’re not training with me anymore, he’s going to kick your ass”, chimes in a drunk Giles, shocking Buffy very much. Xander then volunteers to go with her, but she tells him that she’s doing it alone. Willow and Xander are both quite angry and mouth off at her. Willow talks sarcastically about them being in the way, and Xander brings up the talk about shipping him off to the Army. Buffy tries to calm them down, but Willow demands to know if they’re useful and if so, how much. Buffy answers that Willow is going at the computer stuff… and the witch stuff. The latter expression further infuriates the redhead; Buffy tells them to stop, that this is crazy, but Giles counters that it’s actually finally making perfect sense. While Anya and Tara wait out the storm in the bathroom and Giles finally stumbles up to bed, the argument reaches its full force; Willow mockingly says that Xander would be great in the Army, but wonders if the umbilical cord between him and Anya would stretch that far. Xander responds by saying he always knew Willow didn’t like Anya, but the redhead comments that she’ll leave the judgemental part to him and Buffy. The Slayer again asks her friend what got into them, and Willow retorts that things went wrong since Tara. Xander turns to her in shock, learning that new fact. But Buffy cuts it short, asking them if they want to help. She says they can all go together into the cave, with Willow and Xander attacking her and the funny drunk drooling on her shoes. She asks them how they can really help, and the Scoobies are silent. Very disappointed, Buffy leaves, saying that if she needs help, she’ll go to someone she can count on. “I’ve been waiting for you”, says Adam as someone walks in. “And now I’m here”, answers Riley. Summary by OttsFiveByFive.

Episode Ratings

Mac -

“2 episodes left, and the season story arc is just now getting good.”

DJ Angelus -

“The Gang is Splitting. Adam is ready to unleash his plans. Things look grim.”

Quotes

Key: B=Buffy, G=Giles, X=Xander, W=Willow, R=Riley, A=Anya, S=Spike, T=Tara, F=Forrest, An=Angel

Colonel: She’s just a girl. … S: She’s a lot more than that. Slayer’s dangerous, is all I’m saying. Adam: Yes. She makes things interesting. S: No. See, you’re not getting it, Mr. Bits. You’re gonna be interestingly dead. Little Miss Tiny’s got the habit of bollixing up the plans of every would-be unstoppable bad-ass who sets foot in this town. Just want you to know, when the big ugly goes down, Slayer’s going to be right in the thick of it. You ready for that? Adam: I’m counting on it.

Adam: Two Slayers. S: That’s right. Adam: And you killed them both. S: Yeah. I killed the hell out of them.

Adam: You feel smothered. Trapped like an animal. Pure in its ferocity. unable to actualize the feelings within. Clinging to one truth, like a flame, struggling to burn within an enclosed glass: that a beast this powerful cannot be contained. Inevitably, it will break free and savage the land again. I will make you whole again, make you savage. S: Wow.

S: I get why all the demons all fall in line with you. You’re like Tony Robbins. If he was a big, scary, Frankenstein-looking… You’re exactly like Tony Robbins.

S: You don’t want her Slayerettes mucking about. Adam: Take them away from her. S: Well, there’s a plan. She’s working solo, she won’t have a chance to come after us when the wild rumpus begins. Plus, it’ll make her miserable. And I never get tired of that.

X: Try those on - you’ll feel like a new man. R: Would this man have a bright red nose and big floppy feet?

R: But as post-apocalypse splendor goes, I’ve done wonders with the place.

R: I take it you’re not an Angel fan, either. X: It’s not like I hate the guy… just, you know, the guts part of him.

X: Angel’s an okay guy if he’s mopey and sad and brooding, but you give him even one second of pure, real pleasure… R: And that sets him off. X: Only in the big old “kill your friends kind of way. And you know what makes Angel happiest? I’ll give you a hint: it’s not creme brulee.

R: That explains a lot of things that I wish weren’t explained.

X: Hey, man, that’s all ancient history. R: She went running to LA to bone up on her history. X: No, I’m sure it’s boneless.

S: You know, for someone who’s got “Watcher” on his resume, you might want to cast an eye to the front door every now and again.

S: What, you think I’d come running over saying “I’ve got a secret. Beat me till I talk”?

G: What do you want? S: Year’s supply of blood, guaranteed protection, merry bushels of cash, and most important, a guarantee that I’m not to be in any way slain.

S: What makes you think she’ll listen to you? G: Because. S: Very convincing. G: I’m her Watcher. S: I think you’re neglecting the past tense there, Rupert.

S: I’ve seen the way she treats you. G: Ah, yes? How’s that? S: Very much like a retired librarian.

W: I keep thinking, “okay, that’s the cutest thing ever.” And then she does something cuter, and completely resets the whole scale. T: Did you see her yawn earlier? W: Yes! I thought I was gonna die!

W: Maybe something fun, like drama. I could be dramatic. “You cannot have more catnip! You have a catnip problem.” T: Definitely drama.

W: I used to assume we’d be roomies through grad school, well into little old ladyhood. You know, cheating at Bingo together, and… forgetting to take our pills.

B: You joined the circus? R: Xander took my clothes to clean them, left me these. Does he, uh, hate me in some way I don’t know about yet?

R: It’s the pants, isn’t it? It’s okay, I couldn’t take me seriously in these things, either.

R: I have to recharge them every two hours or they go dead on me.

S: This is just… swell.

A: Wow - the chip in your head means you can’t even point a gun? How humiliating.

S: I’m taking a risk here, you know? X: Can I tell you how much I really don’t care?

A: You’re joining the Army?!? X: Okay, one: ow. Two: where’d you get that idea? Three: ow!

X: It happens that I’m good at a lot of things. I help out with all kinds of… stuff. I have skills, and… stratagems.. I’m very… help me out. A: He’s a viking in the sack.

X: Xander got fired from Starbucks. Xander got fired from that phone-sex line. A: They look down on you. X: And they hate you. A: But they don’t look down on me.

F: You killing humans now? B: Not yet. Beating you senseless should do just fine.

F: Family’s tearing apart. B: Family? What kind of family are you, Corleones?

S: A couple of them make me on the way out, but I took care of them. G: Gave them a good running-away-from, did you?

S: Can you fix ’em? W: Crack a government encryption code on my laptop? Easy as really difficult pie. S: You’re not exactly the whiz these days, either. God, I’m never gonna get paid. W: I am a whiz. T: She is a whiz. W: If ever a whiz there was.

Soldier: They’re going to start tearing each other apart. Colonel: I have no problems with that scenario.

R: Way I heard it, you were all peaceable now. You didn’t by any chance go and lose that pesky soul again, did you?

An: Think you’re going to stop me? R: I surely do.

An: Can I come in? B: I guess. An: I need a little more than that.

B: Let me guess: you thought of something else really hurtful to say and, well, you couldn’t tell me on the phone because the funniest part is that look on my face.

B: Running your car into a tree is an accident. Running your fist into somebody’s face is a plan.

An: Put that gun down. R: It’s pretty much all I got left, so I’m thinking not.

B: He won’t hurt anybody. Tell him! An: Might hurt you. R: Oh, please try. An: Huh, some threat. You can barely stand. R: My trigger finger feels okay. An: You actually sleep with this guy?

B: I see one more display of testosterone-poisoning, and I will personally put you both in the hospital.

B: I would really like to know - what the hell are you trying to do? An: I was trying to make things better. It’s, uh, going pretty good, don’t you think? B: Swell.

An: He wasn’t real forthcoming with the benefit of the doubt.

An: Oh, and… Riley? B: Yeah? An: I don’t like him. B: Thank you.

S: Call it the Yoko factor. Don’t tell me you’ve never heard of the Beatles? Adam: I have. I like “Helter Skelter”.

B: How bad are you hurt? R: Dunno yet. The night’s still young.

R: Xander said… B: Xander? Oh, he’s the deadest man in Deadonia.

R: When I saw that he was bad… B: He’s… not bad. R: Seriously? That’s a good day? Well, there you go. Even when he’s good, he’s all Mr. Billowy-coat, king of pain, and girls really…

R: See? Nuts.

B: Then why with the crazy? R: Because I’m so in love with you I can’t think straight. B: Tell me about it.

B: Okay, Will, how long before you un-crypt it? W: Hours? Days maybe. Anyone suggesting months would not be accused of crazy talk.

G: Whatever happened to Latin? At least when that made no sense, the Church approved.

W: Right, and then maybe you’ll get lucky and he’ll still be there, and he can rip your arms off for you.

G: You never train with me anymore. He’s going to kick your ass. B: Giles! G: Sorry. Was it a bit honest? Terribly sorry.

X: I’ll stay behind and putter around the Batcave with crusty old Alfred here. G: Ah, no, I am no Alfred, sir. No, you forget, Alfred had a job.

W: Oh, wow, we’re already getting in the way. We’re pretty good at this, Xander, huh?

W: Besides, when is ther any “us two”? You two are the two who are the two. I’m the other one.

B: Are you drunk? G: Yes, quite a bit, actually. B: Well, stop it.

G: I, for one, am not missing a minute of it…

T: You think this will go on for a while? A: Hard to say. T: Nice bathroom. A: Like the tile.

W: No, you’d be wonderful in the Army. Do you think the umbilical cord between you and Anya will stretch that far?

X: Tara’s your girlfriend? G: Bloody hell!

B: Judgemental? If I was any more open-minded about the choices you two make, my whole brain would fall out.

X: Just because you’re better than us doesn’t mean you can be all superior.

B: We’ll walk into that cave with you two attacking me and that funny drunk drooling on my shoe. Credit: The Sunnydale Slayers