My Tara Obsession List · Hellmouth Central

My Tara Obsession List
by Quirky

WARNING: The Following is heavy with spoilers. If you do not want to be spoiled, do not read below this sentence.

Note: This is meant as a joke, but I think I would actually torture myself by doing the things mentioned in the list below. Keep in mind that I will probably be the only one to understand most of this.

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How Tara¹s death would affect me.
(Although her life seemed to affect me more).

When the group’s attention is focused on me, I will get shy and say nothing.
Have a speech and silence spell handy. (I might need it).
Take out my anger on a vending machine (it had it coming).
Assure almost complete strangers that they are “special”.
Paint my room black, and cover it with chalk pictures of witches and stars.
Float roses constantly (It is very pretty).
Have a doll’s eye crystal in my possession (it might come in handy).
Smile goofily at others (it’s cute though).
Deliberately sabotage spells that locate demons.
Have my innocent face on, always. (Especially after sabotaging the above-mentioned spell. It is so cute.)
Be amused and impressed when a person slips the word “recon” into conversation.
Do a terrible mime of fighting.
Stutter when I first meet people or am anxious.
Be wary of people whose energy is fragmented (they’re either possessed by hyena’s or someone else is in their body).
Be trusted by others, even when I don’t trust myself.
Have a home powered Draconian Katra handy (just in case).
Insist that I am not a powerful witch (when really, I am).
Keep a clouding spell handy (who knows when an demon may attack).
Feel strangely at home in a janitor’s closet.
Guarantee that horses “don’t like arms very much”.
Do not like frat houses, especially those named “Lowell”.
Implore spirits to find the serenity they seek (if that happens to be in my room, then that’s ok).
Ask my lover if they like cats, and when they ask, “why?” I will reply, “…I want my room to be Willow friendly”. (I know this one is silly, but I like it.)
Laugh softly when I am over-helped. (Ok, I think only I get this one.)
When my girlfriend has mixed feelings over her love for two people, I will reply “do what makes you h-h-happy”.
Have this strange dislike (as well as scared) of werewolves.
Never have candles, only “extra flamey” ones.
Get a black and White kitten, and name her “Miss Kitty Fantastico”. (Only we have to get her a real name.)
Silently slip away from arguments that do not involve me.
Whenever a problem is solved, I will feel somewhat cheated, “I don’t think yippee is the right response, either”.
Learn Greek, just so I can get my “friend” to write “Deathless Aphrodite on your lavish throne” on my back with a calligraphy pen.
Be all-mysterious “you don’t know everything about me.”
“You think you know. What’s to come. Who you are. You haven’t even begun.” Will be my mantra.
Relaxing involves less exertion, so “it’s better just to stay put.” Or suffer “…the pain and heartbreak of stickiness.”
Strangely, not like Dracula.
Know the shop owners name of the nearest magic shop, having been there often.
Whenever I am uncomfortable or have nothing to say, I will offer to thumb wrestle with others.
Have this outside feeling (possibly because I am an outsider).
A strange look comes across my face whenever someone mentions, me being a “good guy”. (I know, I am getting obsessive now).
Have some knowledge on palmistry, but rather learn from a professional.
Tell an amusing story about a kitty and the pound.
Tell jokes that involve Taglarin mythic rites (and I’ll be the only one to understand them).
Call my brother “Donny”, even though that isn’t his name.
Lie unconvincingly. (I manage to cover it up pretty well though).
Cast harmless spells (only they’re not so harmless).
Expect to be disallowed into tight circles (only to be surprised when I am allowed.)
Believe that I am a demon, until my twentieth birthday, when it is proven that I am not.
Whenever I am pissed off with someone, I will say, “Just go”.
“I can’t take my eye’s off you”. Will be my new theme song.
Be one of the few (in my circle of friends) to show actual knowledge.
Believe that Japanese commercials are weird (oh, come on, you know they are).
The reals names of stars don’t really make sense to me, so I sort of have my own.
Be pleased to discover that the world is not being invaded. (Damn Queller demons!)
Think a trip to England sounds, “Exciting and exotic…un…less you’re English”.
“I said Quirky” will be my new catch phrase.
Have stockpiles of Hellebore (it’s now one of my favourites, and even though I don’t need Hellebore, it’s better to be on the safe side).
Be the mediator of fights, if things get out of control, I’ll leave.
Try to explain incidents only, to somehow not explain them properly.
Not eat shrimp at all, believing that I am allergic to it. (I’m not though).
Wonder whether English people are gentler than normal…
Be incredibly anxious when asked questions.
Be strangely scared of those candles that don’t burn out.
Defiantly opposed to teleportation spells.
Strongly believe that Quasimodo’s action were selfishly motivated.
Not really, be good at the computer stuff.
Become depressed over others lack of spelling correctly. (On the net).
If anyone asks my opinion on a girl I just met, I will reply, “she practically had genuine moulded plastic stamped on her ass”. (But I do that anyway J)
Be supportive as well as sympathetic. (Which is kinda’ odd).
Frown upon resurrection spells, “witches can’t alter the fabric of life for selfish reasons…”
Have two eggs, sunny side up, every morning…they wiggle like little boobs (ok, getting really obsessive now J)
Rather watch Koala bears on the discovery channel than the Salem witch trials.
“Checkers” sounds rather convincing, rather then actually just saying “sex”.
For the month of May, I will go “temporally” insane.
Think gargoyles are cute.
I will have a small rubber finger puppet, and mimic Tara “Grr arghh”.
Believe that I am “Tinkerbell”.
State the obvious about the irony of things, “well they wanted a massacre”.
Assume crash positions (expect the worst).
Make funny shaped pancakes for breakfast (they can go with the eggs).
“Spongebob Squarepants”…will be my favourite TV show.
Not really, be one to play “Shiver me timbers”.
Feel that there is no need to overcompensate with big white gloves, especially when I have five fingers. (Unlike a cartoon mouse that I know).
Have this extreme dislike for Lethe’s bramble (who doesn’t though?)
Sing, “I’m under your spell” constantly.
Not to be miss psycho pep squad (but still manage to obsess over things).
Cry whenever I hear the song, “goodbye to you”.
Manage to eat more leafy green foods, rather than gummy green.
Close my eyes for a minute, only to fall asleep.
Have this sudden urge to dedicate my productive cooperation.
The word “gulp” comes to mind (or rather stays there).
Innocently smile when I am mocking others.
Be extremely defensive of my girlfriend and myself.
Wear green dresses with a little dignity.
Save the day (at the last possible minute, ofcourse).

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Even crazier things I would do.

Cry myself to sleep saying, “She’s not dead, she’s sleeping”.
Have the exact wardrobe that “Tara” has.
Change my name to “I said Quirky”.
Belly dance to the song “Touch-a, touch-a, touch me” (rocky horror picture show joke).
Stalk Amber Benson, Kidding J

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And that concludes my obsession list, I hope you realise I can go into further detail with this, and if you encourage me to continue, please e-mail me, I_have_places_to,
Thanks, Quirky.

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