Two to Go
Writer: Doug Petrie
Director : Bill Norton
Cast : Sarah Michelle Gellar as Buffy Summers, Nicholas Brendon as Xander Harris, Emma Caulfield as Anya, Michelle Trachtenberg as Dawn Summers,James Marsters as Spike, Alyson Hannigan as Willow Rosenberg.
Main guest stars : Danny Strong as Jonathan, Tom Lenk as Andrew, James C. Leary as Clem, Jeff Kober as Rack.
Original broadcast date : May 21, 2002
My one-line description: As Rack would say, the strawberry is ripe. But she¹s the one doing the harvesting.
Picking up where Villains left off, Two To Go starts with Buffy, Xander and Anya running away from Warren¹s execution site in the forest. Xander is fighting the urge to be sick, as Buffy tells him they have to get to Willow before she reaches Jonathan and Andrew. Anya informs them that Willow may have a fancy means of transportation, but that it¹s still slow. Then she uses her vengeance demon powers to teleport to the prison. Buffy and Xander find his car wrecked by Willow; still hoping to get to Jonathan and Andrew on time, Buffy sprints away, leaving a dismayed Xander behind.
In jail, Jonathan and Andrew are still arguing whether Warren will come and save them Andrew is convinced Warren may have implanted a communications chip somewhere on one of them. However, Anya appears and fills them in on Warren¹s death and the fact that they are now on the top of the hit list. She then yells for the guard to come open the cell and let the guys out, telling him something terrible is coming this way.
Willow materializes outside the police station, orders an officer to sleep, and starts magically tearing the brick wall apart, making Jonathan and Andrew (on the other side of said wall) freak out. A group of officers try to get to Willow, but she holds them at bay. However, she¹s also unknowingly providing a diversion for Buffy, who enters the now unguarded prison and breaks the two geeks out of their cell. When Willow finally decides to levitate to the second floor where the cell is, she finds it empty “Buffy”, she mutters in fury. Anya tries to calm her down, but Willow knocks her out and starts screaming, a long, powerful and endless scream.
Outside, Xander, Buffy, Jonathan and Andrew make their escape in a stolen police car. As Buffy and Xander talk about what comes next, Jonathan asks why Willow isn¹t after them. Xander tells Buffy the nerd has a point and just then, the car is hit from behind by a huge eighteen-wheeler. Willow is standing on top of the cabin, controlling the truck. Xander manages to accelerate, and Willow starts losing power, allowing the truck driver to take back control of his vehicle while the Scoobies-Troika make away.
In Spike¹s crypt, Clem is trying to cheer up a brooding Dawn by going through a chips taste test. However, Dawn is more concerned with Willow, Buffy and Xander. Clem, mourning all that¹s happened, tells her that he¹d do anything to help her. Dawn smiles at him, and asks “Anything?”.
In a cavern in Africa, Spike is preparing to undergo the trial that will give him what he wants. A bare-chested warrior approaches, and the vampire is convinced he can take him until the man slams his fists together and they catch on fire.
At the Magic Box, Anya and the gang are trying to scrounge up whatever magic books Willow hasn¹t drained. Anya recovers a text for protection spells she thinks is in Sumeran; Jonathan offers to help with the deciphering, but Buffy coldly tells him to shut up, informing him that she¹s saving him and Andrew to prevent Willow from crossing the line by killing them . Before he obeys, he gives them a useful bit of information Willow will have to recharge her energies soon.
Willow enters Rack¹s shrouded place, and he starts marvelling at what she¹s become. After telling her she still smells like strawberries, only now she¹s ripe, he asks her what she wants. “To take a little tour”, she answers ragingly, plunging her hand in his chest and draining his power.
A frightened Clem leads Dawn to Rack’s place, but refuses to follow her into the warlock¹s inner sanctum. Dawn enters alone, and finds Rack hanging upside down, dead. As she turns to leave, a newly-recharged Willow stands in the way, smiling lopsidedly at her. Scared by Willow¹s appearance, Dawn tries to reason with her by telling her she misses Tara too. Willow asks her if she cried, then goes on to say that Dawn cries all the time, whines all the time, and that it would be better off if she turned her back into a ball of energy. A terrified and hurt Dawn shrinks away from the witch, but Buffy arrives. “I think you better get away from her”, she menacingly tells Willow.
At the Magic Box, Anya and Xander are still trying to decipher the text; Jonathan offers once more to help, but Xander rejects it. Jonathan sits back down, and Andrew discreetly suggests they make their escape. Telling Jonathan he¹ll happily let him be the leader, he asks for orders. Irritated, Jonathan manhandles Andrew against the wall and tells him to grow up.
Meanwhile, Anya and Xander start bickering about the way their relationship ended. Anya is frustrated by her inability to take vengeance on Xander, and tells him he has no right to be the martyr. She is still talking about the relationship, but Xander tells her she¹s right, that he¹s been irrelevant and ineffectual; he goes on to admit that he saw Warren¹s gun before he started shooting, and couldn¹t do anything about it.
Buffy tries to convince Willow to let Dawn leave, but the witch rejects her friend¹s appeal to her humanity, telling them that the old Willow was always a loser, except for those moments when Tara would look at her. Buffy tells her friend that she knows she¹s in pain, but that life is still worth living. Willow laughs it off, because in her opinion, Buffy, since she came back, doesn¹t want to live. As they argue, the scenery around them shifts Willow has transported them to the Magic Box.
Dawn and Buffy collapse, and Willow turns to Jonathan and Andrew, preparing to obliterate them. However, her magics don¹t harm them unbeknownst to Willow, Anya is hidden behind a curtain, chanting a protection spell.
Cut to Africa, where Spike, covered with burns, manages to snap Fire-Hands¹ neck, only to discover that yet more tests await
At the Magic Box, Willow casts a spell on herself to augment her energies. Buffy, however, is not about to let her kill the two geeks stepping in front of her friend, she tells Willow she doesn¹t want to hurt her. Willow nonchalantly knocks her aside; getting up, Buffy returns punch for punch, sending Willow crashing across the room.
While Willow is down, Xander and Dawn quickly sneak Jonathan and Andrew outside. Angry, Willow turns on Buffy, telling her that after six years of being the sideman, it¹s her turn to be the Slayer, and that Buffy deserves to have every square inch of her ass kicked. She then proceeds to make good on that promise, knocking Buffy around the room. Buffy manages to throw Willow a few times unfortunately, one of those times makes Willow land at Anya¹s feet. Realizing Anya is the one who¹s been chanting the protection spell, Willow announces her plan to stop her violently.
Outside, Xander and Dawn lead the two geeks away, but Andrew rebels, saying he doesn¹t want to stay in Sunnydale but wants to go to Mexico instead. He points a sword at Xander¹s neck, but then gets another sword pointed at his by Jonathan, who looks dead serious about using it. Andrew unhappily backs down, and Jonathan tells him that after this, they¹re going back to jail to do their time.
In the Magic Box, Willow throws Anya against a bookcase, knocking her unconscious. Then she tells Buffy that she now gets what being the Slayer is about it¹s the power. She knocks out her friend, gloating that no one can stop her now. Suddenly, she¹s thrown to the ground by a bolt of green light.
“I’d like to test that theory”, says a grim-faced Giles, standing in the doorway.
Summary by OttsFiveByFive.
Episode Ratings
Mac -
“Not quite the pace I was looking for, but it was the first hour of a 2-parter. I guess it has
that excuse. Giles is back and it’s gonna be war!”
Quotes
(B=Buffy, X=Xander, W=Willow, S=Spike, D=Dawn, A=Anya, J=Jonathan, Aw=Andrew, C=Clem, R=Rack)
B: Meet me at the jail.
X: Sure, how you gonna…
*Buffy runs off*
X: Ok then. I’ll just…catch up. She’s only my best friend, ya know. No big deal..just…*punches hood* glad I can help.
J: Say, maybe we can trade a pack of cigarettes in for tinfoil. Make you a nice little antenna hat.
Aw: Laugh it up, fuzzball.
Aw: Lex Luthor had a false epidermus escape kit in Superman vs. The Amazing Spiderman treasury edition…
J: Ok, first of all those were sonic disrupters. Second of all, you are sadness personified. Waiting for Warren? Yeah, maybe he’ll come bust us out of here in Santa’s magic slay.
Aw: You were out of the trio a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. And you wanna know why, little feller? No respect for the chain of command.
Aw: Oh my God…Warren.
J: Oh my God…me. Guard!!
Policeman: Look, I don’t know what you’re doing, but…
W: Take a nap.
*plop*
W: Buffy…
A: Willow, just stop for a second and listen to…
*ZAP*
W: AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
X: Boys, if you don’t knock it off, I will pull this car over and you can just walk to your painful deaths from here.
J: I still can’t believe that was Willow. I mean I’ve known her almost as long as you guys. Willow was…you know. She packed her own lunches and wore floods, and was always….just Willow.
*smash*
J&Aw: Jeez…what was that??!
X: Just Willow.
J: She’s draining…
X: She’s whating?
J: Just keep going.
D: As taste tests go, this is one of the better ones I’ve been too.
C: Let me get my hat and my coat…I’ll take you to a movie. We’ll go nuts. PG-13.
C: …Cause your sister’s the slayer, I’m a demon. That’s real good insentive to get along with her.
S: And since your pad is decked out gladiator style, and no number 2 pencils have been provided, I guess we’re not starting with the written.
S: Here we are now. Entertain us.
*whap*
S: Son of a….
C: Uh, I don’t feel anything. Uh oh, oh well. Let’s go home…
C: It’s just….Rack’s not partial to the floppy ear th…he has a thing! But but hey, I’m in…absolutely.
J: I’ve dabbled…in magics.
X: I think Willow’s in a league of her own, dabble boy.
B: Thank you. Now remember that thing we talked about?
J: About me shutting up? Right.
R: So tell me…strawberry…what on this earth do you want?
W: Just to take a little tour.
*ZAP*
D: You wanna wait here?
C: If that works for you.
D: Be right back.
W: Hey cutie.
D: You’re back on the magics.
W: No honey, I am the magics.
D: Did you kill that guy?
W: It’s an improvement, believe me.
W: You miss her?
D: Yes.
W: Did you cry? Of course you did. I get that. I understand the crying. You cry because you’re human…but you weren’t always.
D: Yes, I was.
W: Oh please. You’re telling me you don’t remember? You used to be some mystic ball of energy. Maybe that’s why you’re crying all the time, Dawnie. Cause you don’t belong here. Wanna go back? End the pain? You’ll be happier, I’ll be happier, we’ll all be a lot happier without listening to the constant whining.
D: Willow…stop.
W: *whiny voice* Mom, Buffy, Tara, waaaah. It’s time you go back to being a little energy ball.
A: I can’t do this. I’m in retail. Stupid ancient sumarian.
Aw: You saw her. She’s a truck driving magic momma. And we’ve got maybe seconds before Darth Rosenberg grinds everybody into jawa burgers, and not one of you bunch has the medechlorians to stop her.
X: You’ve never had any tiny bit of sex, have you?
A: The annoying virgin has a point.
A: I care if you live or die, Xander. I’m just not sure which one I want.
X: Look we both know things might get ugly at Wiccapalooza, and if it gets really bad…
A: Let me guess…you’ll propose?
A: You know none of this would be happening if it weren’t for you.
X: You think I don’t know that? You think I’m the hero of this piece? I saw the gun….before Warren raised it. I saw it and I couldn’t move. He shot two of my friends before I could even. You want me to know how useless I am, that it’s my fault? Thanks, already got the memo.
A: I was talking about us.
W: I wasn’t gonna hurt her, buzzkill.
W: Let me tell you something about Willow. She’s a loser, and she always has been. People picked on Willow in junior high school, high school, up until college. With her stupid mousy ways, and now Willow’s a junkie.
W: Just moments when Tara would look at me, and I was wonderful. And that will never happen again.
W: You’re try to sell me on the world? The one where you lie to your friends when you’re not trying to kill them, and you screw a vampire just to feel? And insane asylums are a comfy alternative? This world? Buffy, it’s me. I know you were happier when you were in the ground.
W: Jonathon. Andrew. You boys like magic don’t you? Abra Cadabra.
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