SWAT: A Glimpse of Buffy’s Future

As I write this, the premiere of SWAT graces our theaters. Let this article be remembered for that. And only that. Amen.

Actually, that’s a good topic for this week. SWAT, as many of you know, was a television show that came out in early 1975 and ended shortly thereafter in the summer of the following year. For those of you who are bad at math, that means the show had two seasons and ended in the year 1976. Starring Steve Forrest, Rod Perry, and Robert Urich, SWAT may not have lasted long in terms of television shows, but it still gave to us obviously what is known as a long-lasting impression to certain members of Hollywood. The story revolved around the early years of SWAT, back when the division of police officers was basically only a handful of former soldiers who wore their own military fatigues and fought the harder cases of crime that usual police law enforcement couldn’t handle.

In today’s world, SWAT is better known as the most professional law enforcement division in the entire world. A team generally would consist of around thirty or so members…and the only way to apply would be to wait for an opening (and be a police officer for three or more years). It surely must be interesting to watch how the idea for this former television show will be adapted to meet modern times. But why am I bringing this up? Well, obviously, because Michelle Rodriguez is in the movie. But what will be the official opinion so as to sell this article? Well, I’m glad you asked.

Actually, I’m not glad you asked. But I’ll still give you a straight-up answer anyhow. See, I got to thinking as I was watching previews for this program at how differently the characters already seem from their original conceptions back in the mid-1970s. And then as I thought more and more about this…I started thinking about how differently people might conceive Buffy the Vampire Slayer if some odd thirty or so years from now someone ever might be bold enough to actually make a remake of the television series as a motion picture.

To better help explain, mostly for those of you who never watched (or ever heard of) the original SWAT series, here are a few changes I’ve already noticed concerning the program of SWAT as a movie against its original production as a series…

Firstly, just the look of these characters is far different from the original set of team members. Hey, this is actually not a complaint. I’m actually finding the cast a bit more aesthetically pleasing than their predecessors….It’s just something I bring up cause it’s different. However, usually when Hollywood reproduces an old television show, they will choose actors who at least look partially like their former characters did. But such is not the case with SWAT.

Originally…and this is what I hear…Paul Walker was asked to come on board with this SWAT project as one of the leads. Walker turned them down, of course. He’s not in the movie, so don’t get your hopes up….Yeah, and I bet over half of you have no freakin clue who the hell Paul Walker is, right? Anyhow, the movie he was turning SWAT down for?…. “2 Fast 2 Furious.”

I honestly don’t know what goes on in some actors heads most days.

Well, after Walker went off to film a movie that only fifteen people would ever see (the same fifteen people who saw Gigli two weekends ago, by the way)…the crew of SWAT began hoping to snab Mark Wahlberg onto their roster. Mark eventually turned them down as well, though….Which was interesting.

See, before I heard of this film, I never even once imagined that Mark Whalberg would ever turn down a role. Just look at some of the crap he’s put up on the big screen.

But anyway, the crew eventually wisened up some and convinced Collin Farrell (a man who’d never once even seen an episode of the show) to take on the character of Officer Jim Street. I’m actually happy they got this guy…as he seems to be on the rise and extremely good at what he does. And I honestly don’t know anyone who does a better onscreen accent than her or James Marsters. It’s the other two that I’m worried about. Why consider those for the part? And it’s beyond me.

But while we’re on the topic of Collin, I could definitely see him playing Xander Harris in a thirty-year-after remake of Buffy…provided we’d have to be thirty years into the future and Collin would have to be the exact same age he is now.

Speaking of SWAT actors making good characters for Buffy…I could also see Samuel L Jackson playing Giles. I’ve already given my case-in-point evidence for a Michelle Rodriguez version of Buffy….And that only leaves LL Cool J to play Willow. Heck, if that’s not a good cast, I sure as hell don’t know what one is.

Anyway, Sam Jackson will be taking on Forrest’s old role of Hondo. Biggest difference between these two? The hair. Hey, it may be nit-picking but if you don’t believe me just go grab your copy of SWAT Season One on DVD today. That’s right. It’s been released. Betcha didn’t know that, didja? Betcha didn’t even know SWAT was a series til ya read this article, eh?

And the rest of the cast isn’t too far-fetched either, actually. TJ and Deke pretty much seem appropriate….But then there’s the character of Officer Dominic Luka. Now I may not remember the series all too well, but if I’m not mistaken Dominic used to be…well…a guy. One sex change later and suddenly we’ve got Officer Chris Sanchez as a replacement on our hands. Definitely not complaining about this change. Rodriguez is the only reason I agreed to watch this film in the first place.

Anyway, after writing the above seen paragraphs, I actually had a chance to go and see the film. That’s right. So everything in the article from here on down is me after I’ve seen the program. Pretty cool how writing something over the course of a week can suddenly zap you forward in time. Don’t worry. I won’t ruin anything about the plot. All I’ll say is…great film. A must-see. And be on the look-out for Steve Forrest and Rod Perry, as they both make special guest cameos in the film.

Now to the point….Buffy. Yeah, somehow I need to tie all this shit together. See, our way of seeing Buffy in the “now” is far different than the way our children and children’s children will be seeing this program years upon decades away from this hour. The movie SWAT that came out was just one set of great evidence to that fact. Look at the way they’ve adapted an old idea into a modern one. Buffy the Vampire Slayer taking place some thirty years after it was conceived to television….Now THAT is quite spooky.

And you know it’s going to happen eventually, right? The only real way to prevent it would be to have over a dozen films made with the original cast. Kinda like Star Trek did. I doubt we will ever be seeing a different actor as Captain Kirk gracing the enterprise. At least, not a Captain James T. Kirk. And if Buffy doesn’t take heed to this advice, we’re looking at a remake down the road. It happens all the time, especially with cult classics. So just be on the lookout for that…some thirty or so years from now.

In the future, you might see a Buffy film restarting from the beginning…a different cast and characters which seem too far off from their original predecessors. Or perhaps a film which outdoes the series. Doesn’t seem possible today, does it? But hell…it’s happened before. But what about things that might just completely scew the point of the series on a completely different path and ultimately bring the series into one hell of a bad recapture.

For instance, think of a non-British Giles. Horrifying, right? Or maybe we’d replace Cordelia with a male character antagonist for Xander. As for villains…they’d probably cook up something new. That might be interesting. But the way in which they would present this show…would be anything but. If you don’t believe me…just take a look at Scooby Doo the motion picture.

Yeah…we all remember that mistake. And now they’re making a sequel. The only plus? Two former Buffy castmates on the silver screen. The only minus? Getting to see them act together requires another damned hour and a half of that fucking CGI piece of shit that calls itself a talking dog.

Anyway, back to the point…

Movie versions of series past. God, that’s a lame topic. We’ve seen them all by now. From The Beverly Hillbillies to Mission Impossible and from The Brady Bunch all the way to SWAT…they make our world spin on an axis long forgotten. So I say, three cheers to them all. And three cheers to the future of Buffy in regards to them. Will we one day be seeing such a motion picture gracing theaters down the road? I’d say you can bet your bottom dollar on it.

Okay, that’s it for me. Point of the article this week? Watch SWAT. And if you don’t like to sit in theaters, just rent Gods and Generals on DVD. Hey, it has a Buffy person in it. That’s always worth something, right?

Yeah, maybe not. See ya next week.