Dumbass of the Week: Ehren Watada

Today I analyze very briefly the dumbass of the week. That title belongs to Ehren Watada today, the 28 year old lieutenant of the American armed forces who decided shortly after joining the Army that instead of fulfilling his contract and duty that he swore to uphold… he would rather make a mockery out of our deployed troops by claiming the war he fights is “illegal” and therefore he doesn’t have to fight it.

While I do have sympathy for those who joined our Reserves never believing they would have to fight, my sympathy does not extend to those like Watada… trained soldiers who not only joined the Army outright… but joined it in the year 2003.

After coming home briefly, it appears Mr Watada stumbled upon websites that seemed to denounce the war, calling it “illegal.” He claims that he was surprised by this and immediately began to believe it. According to Watada, due to this illegality of the war in Iraq, he no longer wishes to serve his country within the borders of that nation. Watada now uses this as a framing for his legal argument… an argument which, according to a military judge just yesterday, won’t be heard in court.

Really? A retarded argument won't be heard in a military court? What an outrage.

Surprisingly enough in this case, the military offered Watada a chance to take up a non-combat position in Iraq, an action which deserves most credit toward why Watada is an idiot. Watada, who apparently believes even walking on Iraqi soil or breathing Iraqi air is illegal, chose to decline this generous offer and instead wanted to take his case to trial, where the world at large could read about it and have some amazing awareness that previously they did not have. Unfortunately for Watada, most Americans already had an opinion on Iraq.

As a result, at this point at least, it seems that Watada could very well be on his way to serving a maximum of six years in a military prison along with a discharge.

So today I address Mr Watada, my honorary inductee as Dumbass of the Week.

Mr Watada, you are a moron. Being former JROTC during the era before 9/11, I know many former classmates who have served time in Iraq. People who I spent every day of my high school social life with. These were men and women who joined BEFORE conflict reared its ugly head into the international scene. But not one of them ever backed down from their call of duty.

Many of them perhaps didn’t agree with the politics. In fact, I know quite a few of them did not. They came from different creeds and different beliefs. But the catch of this point is that you, as a volunteer soldier, now turn your back on everything you have sworn to uphold. While they, men and women who signed on to this life before the conflict was even a remote idea, served their oaths loyally.

It doesn’t matter if you don’t agree with the war, Mr. Watada. You volunteered for it. In fact, you volunteered for it apparently before you bothered to read about it. How then are we, being educated people, supposed to believe that suddenly, out of the blue, you now have this sudden desire to read up on something that could get you killed? This desire did not exist before now. Instead, you now freely admit that you went full speed ahead without knowing any of the facts nor apparently caring about them.

That makes you not only un-American, Sir… it makes you a dumbass. I’m sorry that you don’t agree with the war now that you’ve bothered to read about it. But perhaps you should have studied what you were getting yourself into a little better, learning all sides and viewpoints along with forming a viewpoint for yourself, before you volunteered to get suited up and armed.

I realize, of course, that you joined the Army in 2003… apparently a time period in which the internet did not exist. But not only were people protesting the courses of action the Bush Administration was taking in regards to international policy in that year, they were doing it some time before that, as well. Your sudden awareness that the world exists beyond your narrow view of yourself is troubling.

But let's give your case a chance. Let's look at your true argument in this matter.

Your claim is that the government “lied” to you. Really? The government lied to you? Well, color me impressed, Champ. I am truly shocked. Since that has never happened before in the history of time, I suppose you deserve some leeway.

Therefore, I agree with you. You shouldn’t go to Iraq. You should go to prison. And after you serve those years, perhaps you wouldn’t mind looking me up. I have a car I want to sell you. And you can take my word for it, Champ… it runs like a gem.

Ehren Watada: Dumbass of the Week